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THIS MENU IS STUNNING YES!  BUT WHY NO NIPPLES IN THE DAILY EXPRESS?       LETS TAKE A TRIP DOWN TO SCROLLERSVILLE. IF YOU REACH THE END OF THIS ONE YOU WILL FALL OFF IT!     IN FACT IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT IS ON THIS DISK AND HOW TO LOAD IT YOU WILL HAVE TO READ ALL OF IT SO TOUGH.  NOW THAT I JUST THOUGHT OF THAT I SHALL MOVE THE RELEVANT PART OF THE SCROLLER TO THE BACK OF IT!    COR! I BET HE DRINKS CARLING BLACK NAME TAG (WELL IN THE PILOTS WORDS ANYWAY)  AS IT HAPPENS I DRINK STONES MIXED WITH BASS NO.1 COS I AM WELL ARD     THE SUB HUMANS IN TURKEY PRESENT AUTOMATION DISK NO. 300 , YET MORE SOFTWARE FOR YOUR DISK COLLECTION.    VAPOUR HERE!  PRESS A TO I FOR MUSIC...  0 TO TOGGLE HERTZ...  6 TO 9 TO ALTER SCROLLER...        THIS GAME WAS EASY TO CRACK AND PACK AND CONVERT BACK TO MSDOS BUT SINCE IT WAS OVER ONE AND A HALF MEG OF DATA THERE WAS NOT MUCH ROOM LEFT FOR ANYTHING ELSE SO AFTER WAITING 2 WEEKS FOR YET ANOTHER DOC FILE WHICH HAS NOT FOUND ITS WAY TO ME I HAVE DECIDED TO GIVE YOU A MEGA DISK LIST AND THE LONG AWAITED TRAVELLING SCROLLER.  THIS SCROLLER COULD BE A BIT CRUDE IN PLACES BUT I HAVE NOT CENSORED IT BECAUSE DURING THE SLAGGING WAR A FEW WEEKS AGO THERE WERE SEVERAL PEOPLE IN AUTOMATION SLAGGED OFF WHO HAVE NEVER HAD THE CHANCE TO WRITE A SCROLLTEXT. THEY GET THERE PENNIES WORTH IN THIS SCROLLER SO DARE YOU READ IT!!!!!!    THIS COOL PIC IS BY THE CMT FROM SWEDEN. SEND SOME MORE GUY!     AND NOW ON WITH THE TRAVELLING SCROLLER THAT KINDA GOT LOST!     I ( EGB ) HAVE BEEN FAIRLY BUSY TODAY, THIS AFTERNOON I RECEIVED AN EXTREMELY WELL WRAPPED PARCEL FROM XERUD. IT CONTAINED ALL THESE LOVELY 16 X 16 FONTS.... ALL THIS WAS ENOUGH TO INSPIRE ME TO GO AND WRITE A 16 X 16 SCROLLER TO GO WITH THE FONTS.... THREE HOURS LATER, THE SCROLLER IS ALMOST FINISHED ( WHY DOES THE FAST FORWARD AND REWIND JERK SO BADLY?????? ) AHHH!!! GOT IT..... TO CONTROL THE SCROLL PRESS "9" FOR SLOW SPEED, "8" FOR MEDIUM SPEED, "6" FOR FAST FORWARD AND "6" FOR FAST REWIND. NOW THEN, BEFORE I START PRATTLING, I MUST SHOW YOU ALL OF THESE LITTLE LOGOS THAT XERUD HAS DRAWN FOR US * * * * * * * * THE COMPACTION MASTERS  AUTOMATION NOW CONSISTS OF..... VAPOUR           VAPOUR           VAPOUR          HE HAS GOT THREE HEADS!       THE UN-NAMEABLES     ( DACK AND THE LAW )      NEIL OF COR-BLIMEY  ( NICE TO SEE YOU BACK IN THE THICK OF THINGS!!! )      SHARAZ JEK  ( OUR REMOTE DEBUGGER!!! SOME GREAT PACKS LATELY!!! )      OZZWALD  ( GONE TOOOOO LONG.... )     THE BBC  ( ANDY THE ARFLING, THE PILOT AND CHRISPY NOODLE ( WONDER WHERE YOU NICKED THE PLANETS GUYS....) )       GOL         ( ONE OF OUR NEWER MEMBERS )       PYROTECHNICS  ( IGNITER AND XERUD AND DR. MANHATTAN )        THE SUB HUMANS IN TURKEY  ( ME ( EGB ), BISC AND ARN WHO IS OFF IN TEX COUNTRY AT THE MO.. )     OTHER UNFORTUNATE PEOPLE WHO DO NOT HAVE THEIR OWN LOGOS ON THIS SCROLLER ARE .... PURSY ( SOME GREAT PICS RECENTLY ), IAN.C, WAYNE, THE QUARTET, STAN THE MAN AND u IRS u             RIGHT NOW THATS DONE ON WITH THE NONSENSE.....v v v YOU REALLY OUGHT TO SMILE YOU KNOW.... EVEN IF YOUR NAME IS ALIEN ( I AM NOT GOING TO SLAG YOU OR ANY OF YOUR WORK, BECAUSE I NEVER SEE ANY POMPEY PIRATES MENUS ANYWAY, THE ONLY ONE I HAVE EVER SEEN WAS THE ONE THAT WAS SLAGGING ME ( WRONGLY ) HOWEVER I SEE THAT YOU MANAGED TO FIGURE OUT WHAT THE ACRONYM OF SUB HUMANS IN TURKEY WAS.... IN ANSWER TO YOUR LITTLE OUTBURST WE DO NOT HACK OR CRACK VERY MUCH, BUT JUST TO KEEP YOU HAPPY THERE ARE A FEW OF MY HACKS AND PACKS ON RECENT DISKS  NOW LET ME SEE HOW MANY BRACKETS HAVE I OPENED... PLENTY ) THERE I THINK THAT CLOSES THAT, DONT YOU!!!!!     OK AUTOMATION ARE YOU LISTENING.... WOULD NEIL OF COR-BLIMEY , THE BBC , GOL        AND SHARAZ JEK  PLEASE GET IN TOUCH EITHER THROUGH DACK, THE LAW OR VAPOUR FOR ***** OPERATION WHO CARES ***** NEXT MUST COME A SMALL APOLOGY TO ANYONE WHO WAS OFFENDED BY MENU 241 SCROLL CONTENTS ( SOMEONE WAS , APART FROM MEGA LAMERS ) BUT IT WAS FAIRLY NECESSARY..... THE BBC SEEM TO BE IN QUITE A SIMILAR POSITION WITH THESE SHAOLIN LAMERS, YES IT IS VERY ANNOYING WHEN PEOPLE NICK YOUR CODE, YOUR GRAPHICS, AND YOUR CRACKS, AND THEN PUT THEIR NAME ON THEM... NUFF SAID..............THIS SCROLLER WILL CONTINUE BUT AT THE MOMENT I MUST DO SOMETHING ELSE..... SLEEP!!! BYE BYE!!!........(THE NEXT DAY, IN THE EVENING)................. HI THERE, THIS IS THE IGNITER OF PYROTECHNICS    AS I TALK TO YOU, EGB IS SITTING TALKING TO DACK OF THE UN-NAMEABLES WHICH MEANS I CAN WRITE AS MUCH SHIT AS I LIKE.    WELL IT SEEMS THIS IS GOING TO BE A TRAVELLING SCROLLER IE. I AM ADDING SOME TEXT, THEN EGB IS GOING TO SEE DACK WHICH MEANS HE WILL ADD SOME, THEN EGB IS GOING TO THE ABODE OF VAPOUR, WHICH MEANS HE WILL PROBABLY ADD SOME. BUT IF THEY WANT TO MAKE ME A LIAR, THEY WONT DO ANY AT ALL.      THE FOLLOWING PIECE OF SCROLLER IS FOR MY FRIEND IN KINGHORN (FIFE)                    u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u u                     WELL THAT IS ENOUGH SHEEP TO KEEP YOU OCCUPIED FOR SOME TIME.   I HEARD THERE IS A PRIZE FOR THE PERSON WHO COMES UP WITH THE WORST MEANING FOR EGB,  WELL I WOULD TELL YOU WHAT THE WORST ONE IS, BUT I DONT WANT TO WIN THE SUB HUMANS PRIZE,  WHICH JUST HAPPENS TO BE TWO WEEKS HOLIDAY IN A PLASTIC TENT (THAT IS IN HOSPITAL FOLKS)      WELL I WAS NEVER ONE FOR WRITING TOO MUCH TEXT SO BYE FROM ME AND OVER TO WHOEVER WANTS TO WRITE THE NEXT BIT ...........  EGB BACK AGAIN FOLKS..... OK AS THE IGNITER WAS SAYING THIS IS GOING TO BE A TRAVELLING SCROLLER... IF I HAD A STACY THEN I MIGHT HAVE ADDED SOME TEXT ON THE MOVE, BUT SINCE I DO NOT HAVE ONE THEN YOU WILL HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL TOMORROW EVENING BEFORE DACK GETS TO ADD HIS SECTION....... VROOOOMM VROOOOMM  OKAY......ABOUT ANOTHER DAY AND A HALF HAS PASSED AND EGB IS HERE WITH ME (DACK) IN ENGLAND..(YOU KNOW THAT LITTLE PLACE STUCK ONTO SCOTLAND AND WALES....ISNT IT FUNNY THAT THE ENGLISH ARE ONLY BRITISH WHEN THEY ARE IN TROUBLE!!!)  WHERE WAS I (SEE MENU 250 FOR THE ANSWER TO THAT QUESTION)...RIGHT...I WAS ABOUT TO RIP THE URINE OUT OF CAPTAIN PARANOID OF THE POMPEY PIRATES!!!! SORRY THAT SHOULD BE ALIEN.....(APPARENTLY HE IS SO PARANOID ABOUT BEING CAUGHT HE NEVER PHONES FROM HIS OWN HOME) AFTER READING THEIR EVER-EVER-SO-WITTY-WHO-CAN-WE-HAVE-A-GO-AT-NOW-SCROLL ON PUMPY PROSTRATES 26 (RAINBOW-OH-LOOK -DISC-TWO-IS-FLIPPED-ONTO-THE-B-SIDE-AGAIN-ISLANDS, BUBBLE BOBBLE AND YET MORE SPACE FILLERS IN THE SHAPE OF RIPPED MUSIC FILES) SLAGGING OFF THE VERSION OF AUTO-ROUTE ON 210. I WOULD JUST LIKE TO CLARIFY SEVERAL POINTS. 1....YES ALIEN IS NOT FIT TO LICK KNOB-CHEESE...WHOOPS THAT PART OF THE SCROLL COMES LATER......1..COMPACT 210 IS STILL IN ITS BETA TEST VERSION AND SHOULD NOT BE ON GENERAL RELEASE (MUCH LIKE ALIEN..BUT PERHAPS THE GOVERNMENTS ADOPT-A-LOONY SCHEME (MOTO ALIEN FELATIO II (LATINISH)) GAVE HIS PARENTS A BIG BONUS FOR TAKING ON SUCH A HOPELESS CASE .....TALKING OF LOONY SCHEMES...NOW THAT THE POLL TAX HAS COME IN WILL ALL OF YOU OUT THERE IN AUTOMATION LAND (JUST ALONG FROM DISNEY WORLD..OPEN ALL YEAR JUST LIKE ALIENS MOUTH) WHO ARE BETTER OFF PUT THEIR HANDS IN THE AIR.................HMMM..NOT A LOT OF YOU ARE THERE.....WHAT CAN YOU SAY ABOUT A SCHEME WHEREBY 25 PERCENT OF PEOPLE ARE ENTITLED TO THE FULL REBATE!.....BOOK A ROOM FOR CAPTAIN COCKUP FOR THAT SCHEME MEANWHILE A FLOWER GROWS IN GOTHAM CITY.....OH..YES..2 ..(THE COMBINED IQ OF 400 ALIENS)..I WOULD JUST LIKE TO SAY THE ...A COMPANY I KNOW BOUGHT 25 STS BECAUSE OF THE SOFTWARE THEY COULD GET...ARGUEMENT DOESNT DO MUCH FOR THE PROFITS OF THE SOFTWARE COMPANIES IF I AM MUCH MISTAKEN! (THIS IS A LITTLE THING CALLED BASIC ECONOMICS..NOW THOSE ARE LONG WORDS SO I WILL EXPLAIN THEM TO ALIEN...NUMBER OF COMPUTERS BOUGHT IS NOT EQUAL TO AMOUNT OF SOFTWARE BOUGHT....IF SOFTWARE NOT OBTAINED LEGALLY THEN PERSON IS A PIRATE....HENCE ALIEN IS A PIRATE...NOT A CRUSADER AGAINST THE TYRANICAL PROTECTION OVERLORDS...HELPING THE NEEDY..(SURGEON HEAL THYSELF)..TO GET THE SOFTWARE THEY CANNOT AFFORD...BUT A PIRATE.......NO QUESTIONS ASKED SOFTWARE INCORPORATED................JUST LIKE ME AND SEVERAL OTHER PEOPLE) 3RD AND FINAL POINT A WARNING TO ALIEN.........................THEY KNOW!!!!................. ENOUGH SLAGGING OFF OF ALIEN (HE PROBABLY CANT HELP IT ANYWAY)...HOW ABOUT A SLAGGING OFF OF NEW ORDER...NO..THEY ARE NOT WORTH IT... I MEAN IF THE ONLY WAY BALD EAGLE CAN GET GAMES TO PACK IS BY TRYING DIFFERENT LOADERS FROM AUTOMATION (NOTE THE SPELLING ALIEN) PROGRAMS UNTIL ONE WORKS I DO NOT THINK THEY DESERVE TO BE MENTIONED..WHO ELSE IS LEFT.....OH I KNOW...ELECTRIC BLUE....I DO THINK THAT ULTRALOAD II (WHICH YOU HAVE RE-ASSEMBLED) IS WORTH MORE THAN A COMMODE 64 EMULATOR....WHY DONT YOU TRY WORKING OUT WHAT IT IS DOING IF YOU WANT IT THAT BADLY....SORRY ALMOST MENTIONED THINKING THERE....WHY WOULD YOU NEED IT..CANT YOU WRITE THE CODE YOURSELF (TO BE READ IN A SARCASTIC TONE)..HERES A MESSAGE TO YOU....THE NEW(BUG FREE(ISH)) VERSION IS GOING TO BE ENCRYPTED IN A SNEAKY WAY SO YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE TO WORK A BIT HARDER NEXT TIME...TIME TO GO AS EGB IS LOOKING A TIDGE BIT BORED AND WE WANT TO GET THIS CODE RUNNING AMAZINGLY PROPERLY....BYE BYE FOR NOW.....CATCH YOU AGAIN.........BEFORE I HAND YOU OVER TO VAPOUR I WOULD JUST LIKE TO REMIND PEOPLE THAT IN THE FILM ALIEN...THE CREATURE WAS SHOT OUT INTO SPACE...APPARENTLY THIS IS WHAT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED TO THE POMPEY PIRATES ALIEN IF HIS FATHER HAD BEEN ABOUT 2 SECONDS QUICKER WHOOPS ALMOST FORGOT (SOUND LIKE A LABEL FROM AUTOBUG 4.11 THERE DONT I EGB) ......DACK SIGNING OFF ALIEN SIGNING ON.      FIVE AM THE FOLLOWING MORNING AND ITS VAPOUR HERE. SEEMS A NICE IDEA THIS TRAVELLING SCROLLER BUT SINCE I HAVE WRITTEN A LENGTHY SCROLLER JUST BEFORE JUMPING IN ON THIS ONE I AM NOT GOING TO WRITE MUCH COS I AM KNACKERED. SO ITS OFF TO DO SOME WORK ON THE PICCY AND TO GET THIS CODE READY TO SEND TO THE BBC VIA THE HOMEBOY.  OK I JUST WANT TO SAY THANKS TO ALL MY OLD AND NEW CONTACTS WHO KEEP ON FLOODING AUTOMATION WITH ORIGINAL SOFTWARE (ESPECIALLY OUR SHOP CONTACTS THROUGHOUT THE COUNTRY) AND A BIG THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU WHO HAVE KEPT THE VARIETY IN OUR MENUS GOING WITH SOME GREAT PICTURES AND SOURCE CODE. HEY NEIL! TAKE NOTE OF THE FONT STYLE OF YOUR LOGO, FAMILIAR? ITS BETTER THAN MY LOGO THOUGH WELL ITS TIME TO REMOVE THE MATCHSTICKS FROM UNDER MY EYELIDS AND OFF TO BED IT IS FOR ME. I HAVE BEEN BLAGGED INTO DECORATING THE BACK BEDROOM. ITS EITHER THAT OR MY SUITCASE WILL BE PACKED AN RARIN TO GO! OK POSTY GET THIS DISK TO LONDON FOR A BADLY BREWED SCROLL.                              YO! THIS IS AUTOMATION CD, UM, THAT BITS BEEN DONE HAS IT? OH WELL HERE I GO, LUCKILY FOR YOU I AM NOT IN A SADISTIC MOOD SO THIS WILL BE SHORT (THOUGH PROBABLY NOT VERY SWEET). THIS IS THE PILOT... OF THE BBC SCROLLING PAST, AND TO GET YOU GOING I AM GONNA ADOPT A TECHNIQUE USED BY MANY FOREIGN GROUPS - THE BROKEN ENGLISH SCROLLER. AS I WERE ABOUT TO SAID, I ARE HERE WITH ALL OF MY FRIEND, AND WE BRING TO YOU MORE OUR CRACKS. WE WANT THAT YOU LIKE THEM AND THE OTHER CULE DISKS WE DONE FOR YOU. SORRY, CANT KEEP THIS UP, IF YOU WANT TO SEE MORE THEN READ A REPLICANTS INTRO OR MOST AMIGA SCROLLERS. ON THE SUBJECT OF AMIGA, I SEND TO CULE AMIGA GROUP, PLATINUM LIGHT REGARDS - ECSTASY, THE BEST BRITISH AMIGA GROUP. HI TO MELTDOWN AND RAVER - THANX FOR THE DEMOS AND GRAFIX. HI TO QUARTZ, NICE CHICKEN DEMO, DONT I KNOW YOU FROM SOMEWHERE ?  WHILE I AM AT IT (FNARR FNARR EH PYRO?) I WILL GREET SOME CONTACTS, HI TO ALL IN AUTOMATION THAT I SWAP WITH, DEREK MD, HOMEBOY AND ZIPPY (ME AND ANDY WOULD LIKE TO SEND LOADS BUT YOURE TOO BLOODY FAST!). OTHER PEOPLE DOING GREAT STUFF ON ST ARE ST AMIGOS (HI LITTLE LULU), REPLICANTS, EMPIRE AND IN A SOMEWHAT DIFFERENT WAY, SEWER SOFT. OK, SO ITS VERY SHORT BUT I LACK THE INCLINATION TO STAY AT IT, SO I WILL SEND IT AS IS. HEY POST OFFICE, STOP STEALING MY PARCELS. CUE LAW......         WOWSERS! THIS IS A LOOOOOOONG SCROLLTEXT EH?    WELL I SEE THAT DACK HAS ALREADY SLAGGED ALIEN OFF SO 95 PERCENT OF MY TEXT IS NOW REDUNDANT......    (YOU MAY BE WONDERING WHY I ATTEMPT A TRUCE AND THEN SLAG HIM OFF AGAIN LATER ON.....   WELL....    YOU SEE HE COMPLETELY IGNORES THEM AND JUST CONTINUES TO SLAG US OFF (EVEN THOUGH HE PROMISED THE BBC THAT ALL THIS WOULD END) SO YOU SEE THERE REALLY IS NO END TO THE LACK OF SIZE OF THIS DICKHEADS BRAIN (OR OTHER FLOPPY BITS)      SORRY ALIEN I DO NOT THINK!     ANOTHER SUBJECT ON THE AGENDA IS THE ATARI SHOW     I HOPE I CAN MAKE IT BUT I HAVE MY DOUBTS AT PRESENT (120 QUID FOR A SELF DRIVE 12 SEATER  I COULD HAVE BOUGHT ALL THE THALION GAMES FOR THAT, EVEN THOUGH THE --GAME-- CONTENT IS ABYSMAL (GREAT CODERS CRAP DESIGNERS)        IF I MAKE IT YOU WILL RECOGNISE ME (ALONG WITH THE OTHERS IN THE CREW) BY THE FACT THAT WE WILL BE WEARING AUTOMATION WORLD CLASS TEE-SHIRTS         (I HOPE ALIEN IS THERE COS WE WILL BE IN    F O R C E    AND A LOT OF US ARE ANNOYED AT HIM!    THINK TWICE ABOUT GOING ALIEN!)         COMING SOON TO AN AUTOMATION CD NEAR YOU.....    REVENGE....    THUNDER PACKER VERSION 3.0 (FROM A SOURCE WHO WILL REMAIN ANNONYMOUS)     I WILL FEEL MUCH BETTER AFTER WE HAVE RELEASED THAT....  LET US SEE HOW THE POMPEY PIRATES LIKE IT EH?        AS THIS DISK IS VEEERY LATE TO BE RELEASED YOU MAY ALREADY KNOW THAT THE UN-NAMEABLES ARE GOING INACTIVE.....    THIS IS BECAUSE WE ARE GENERALLY FED UP WITH ALL THIS CHILDISH BICKERING BETWEEN CREWS AND ARE GOING TO SIT ON THE SIDELINES AND WATCH EVERYONE ELSE DESTROY EACH OTHER....  WHEN THEY ARE ALL GONE WE WILL RE-EMERGE AT THE TOP OF THE PILE (ALTHOUGH BEING AN AUTOMATION MEMBER IT IS TOTALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO GET ANY BETTER AS QUITE SIMPLY EVERY ONE ELSE IS --BELOW-- US THE THE SCALE OF GREATNESS           MODEST AS WELL EH?)    HOW MUCH MORE TEXT CAN MY STRAINED BRAIN PRODUCE WITHOUT GETTING TOO BORING (WHAT DO YA MEAN IT IS BORING ALREADY!   YOU DO NOT HAVE TO READ THIS YA KNOW!)    OH YES!    I WILL DO MY MINI-GREETS....   (DO NOT PANIC THEY ARE ONLY ABOUT 100 CHARACTERS LONG!)     HO TO  ANDY THE NEVER HOME ARFLING   THE PILOT   DACK THE TERMINALLY CRAZY APPOLLO OF THE MEGA PHONE BILLS OZZWALD (YOUR SECRET LOCATION IS SAFE WITH ME!)  VAPOUR (MASTER OF THE LONG PAUSE ON THE TELEPHONE COMPLETE WITH KEY CLICK IN THE BACKGROUND!)   EGB AND IGNITOR (VERY RELAXED PEOPLE) AND FINALLY MAL  COL AND BOB (SEE I TOLD YOU I WOULD GET YOU IN HERE SOMEWHERE!)    WELL INSPIRATION HAS RUN OUT YET AGAIN AND I FEAR IT WILL SOON BE TIME TO POST THIS SOURCE CODE OFF TO THE GUARDIANS OF LOGIK......     THERE WILL NOW BE A FOUR DAY DELAY WHILE THE SCROLLTEXT CHANGES OWNERS...   BYE BYE AND OVER TO APPOLLO..........          POST OFFICE---TRAIN---SORTING OFFICE---POSTMAN---APPOLLOS HOUSE---DOORMAT---SEVERAL HOURS LATER SOMEONE COLLECTS IT---APPOLLO OPENS IT---APPOLLO IGNORES IT FOR A FEW DAYS---APPOLLO-STARTS TYPING              NOW             HERE HE COMES,   YES........       WELL ALL I CAN SAY IS IF THERE IS ANYONE STILL READING THIS THEN YOU NEED A BLOODY MEDAL . . . AND THERE IS LOTS MORE TO COME! AND I AM SICK OF TYPING THIS ALREADY BECAUSE I HAVE JUST SPENT THE LAST TWENTY MINUTES CORRECTING ALL THE LAWS SPELLING MISTAKES  . . . . ANYWAY ENOUGH OF THIS I AM GOING TO BED SO I WILL CARRY ON SOME OTHER TIME ZZZZZZZZ      ZZZZZZ       ZZZZZZZ    ZZZZZZ  ZZZZZZZ SOME HOURS LATER . . . u     OVER AND OUT AND ON TO BABY VAPOUR.....     GHFCUYT C      ENOUGH OF THAT TEXT STRAIGHT FROM THE FISTS OF BABY VAPOUR AND BACK TO INSANITY...    THIS WILL BE THE THIRD ATTEMPT TO ASSEMBLE THIS MENU TO A CD THAT IT WILL ACTUALLY FIT ON AND I AM SURE YOU WILL BE GLAD TO SEE THE u OF IT!         COSTA DEL SOL 1    SCOTLAND 0             I HAVE GOT SOME GRASS!        YEAHHHHH!       BUT I GOT NO PAPERS!        OHHHHHHHHH!           BUT I HAVE GOT A PIPE!         YEAHHHHHHH!        BUT I GOT NO MATCHES!        OHHHHHHH!           YEAH! BUT THE STORES OPEN!      YEAHHHHHH!        BUT I AINT GOT ANY MONEY!      OHHHHHHH!           I GOT SOME GRASS!        YEAHHHHHHH!        BUT I BIN BUSTED!        OHHHHHHHH!          A BLACKMAN AND A JEW AT A BUS STOP AND THE BLACKMAN SAYS WHEN IS THE NEXT BUS DUE?     IN ABOUT 10 MINUTES YOU BLACK BARSTEWARD....      AND NOW THE LAST WORDS SAID ON THE ZEBRUGGE FERRY.....      SHUT THO BLUBSE FURIN BLUB BLUB DOORS! BLUB    .............WELL, LOOKS LIKE THATS IT FOR ANOTHER SCROLLER, WE WILL SEE YOU AGAIN SOON........   HEY MAAN! PASS THE DOPE!      YO! ALIEN GET OVER THERE!         10 BSE SANDWICHES LATER!     AND ITS A GOALLLLLL!       SCOTLAND ARE BRAINDEAD!         HAPPY MOTHERS DAAAY!     HAPPY MOTHERS DAAAY!   I AM YA SON  I AM A RUNAWAAAY!      CALL ME A BASTARD   CALL ME A BITCH   YOU ARE MADE OF PLASTIC    YOU ARE FILTHY RICCHHH!       HOW THE HELL DID DAVID PEEL AND THE LOWER EAST SIDE GET IN ON THIS SCROLLER?      SMOKE POT SMOKE POT EVERYBODY SMOKE POT.....   GET OFF MY KEYBOARD YOU DAMN HIPPY!          IIIIII    OOOOOOOOO      SILVA   LININ!        PUNCH   KICK    MAIM      DISMEMBER     ONE LESS SIXTIES FREAK!     THIS IS THE QUARTET PURSY. WOZ. NIK. THE EDITOR. AND MAN X  ON THE KEYBOARD.   WE ARE GLAD TO HAVE A PART IN THIS SCROLLER WITH IT BEING THE 300TH! COMPACT DISK.         MANY THANKS MUST GO TO VAPOUR FOR THE DAY WE SPENT AT AUTOMATION HQ!     NOW NAME A CD WHICH WE HAVE NOT GOT NOW !!!!!!!!!  JUST A FEW HELLOS TO THE PEOPLE WE KNOW       DAVE ............BONEY!    HUDS.....STRYX.....THE ANDROID.....THE TROLL.....B52-CREW......FOXX.....JJF.....AND ANY ONE ELSE WE HAVE FORGOTTEN TO MENTION.       RIGHT, THATS IT! WE WILL END WITH A REALLY WITTY JOKE - WHY DID THE JONNY FLY ACROSS THE ROOM???    GIVE UP?       IT GOT PISSED OFF!!!!HAW!HAW!         ENGLAND 0         HOLLAND 0             BEARDSLEY SUCKS!!! WHERE IS TAYLOR WHEN WE NEED HIM??? HOPE YOU ENJOY THE GAME - SEE YA!   AS PROMISED PRESS 1 TO PLAY DRAGONS BREATH.....  LONG WAIT HUH! AND IT WAS NOT WAS WORTH IT WAS NOT WASNT IT!    IF YOU ARE LUCKY THERE WILL STILL BE SPACE FOR THE ODD SAVED GAME ON THIS DISK!     ..............WRAP TIME...............

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AUTOMATION CD 301 #     IMPORTANT! READ THIS TEXT (OR AT LEAST THE START OF IT!)    IN ORDER TO PLAY 'EMLYN HUGHES INTERNATIONAL SOCCER' YOU MUST FIRST CREATE A 'DATA DISK'   TO DO THIS, FOLLOW THESE SIMPLE STEPS (EVEN 'ALIEN' COULD DO IT!)    1) SELECT 'TOXIC 2' FROM THIS MENU.....    2) LOAD 'TOXIC 2' FROM THE DESKTOP (MED RES IS PREFERABLE).....    3) FORMAT A BLANK DISK TO 80 TRACKS 10 SECTORS AND SINGLE SIDED.....    4) REBOOT THIS MENU.....    5) SELECT 'EMLYN HUGHES DATA MAKE' FROM THIS MENU.....    6) WHEN IT HAS LOADED INSERT YOUR BLANK DISK AND PRESS SPACE TWICE.....    7) REBOOT THIS MENU (AGAIN!).....    8) SELECT 'EMLYN HUGHES GAME FILE'.....    9) WHEN  THIS HAS LOADED INSERT YOUR NEW 'DATA DISK'.....    THERE, THAT WAS EASY, WASN'T IT!   YOU ONLY HAVE TO MAKE A DATADISK ONCE. WE DID IT THIS WAY IN ORDER TO SAVE PEOPLE WHO DON'T LIKE SOCCER (LIKE ME (THE LAW)) HAVING HALF A DISK MISSING IN ORDER TO STORE THE DATA....   WORLD CUP FOOTBALL MANAGER WAS GOING TO BE ON THIS DISK AS WELL, BUT EVEN WE CAN'T GET 158K ONTO A DISK WITH 130K FREE.....    NOW ONTO THE SCROLLTEXT (YOU CAN GO NOW IF YOU WANT TO!)    YES, FOLKS! (IN THE WORDS OF BOTH NEIL AND ANDY) AUTOMATION ARE INTO THEIR THIRD CENTURY!   WOW! AND WE DON'T EVEN LOOK MIDDLE AGED YET!  WE MAY STILL BE AS FRESH AS EVER, BUT WE'VE BEEN AROUND LONG ENOUGH TO KNOW JUST ABOUT ALL THERE IS TO KNOW ABOUT PROTECTION TECHNIQUES.....  OH, BY THE WAY MR NORTHEN, WHY ARE YOU ONLY PARTIALLY ENCRYPTING YOUR STUFF NOW?  HALF A FILE IS EASIER TO DESCRAMBLE THAN A WHOLE ONE!!    HOW ABOUT A FEW GREETS..........    NAAAAAAAA!    TOO BORING!   IF I KNOW YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF GREETED!    ALSO CONSIDER YOURSELF GREETED IF I DON'T KNOW YOU AND YOU ARE NOT THE ALIEN....    THE REST OF THE POMPEY'S CONSIDER THEMSELVES GREETED...     APPOLOGIES FOR ALL THE TYPOS IN THE TEXTS BY FLANNY AND ME RECENTLY, BUT THEY WERE DONE 'EARLY IN THE MORNING, BEFORE THE SUN WAS DAWNING'...ETC...ETC...    ALSO, WHEN I SAID I'D SEE YOU ALL ON 199 I MEANT 299....

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AUTOMATION CD 302   YES, BELIEVE YOUR EYES, AUTOMATION MAKE THEIR RETURN, IN QUITE A BIG WAY...   PLEASE READ --ALL-- THIS SCROLLER (OR AT LEAST THE START!)    AFTER MANY, MANY WEEKS WITH NOTHING FROM YOUR FAVOURITE ST CREW WE RETURN TO GIVE YOU APPROX 30 DISKS IN ONE GO...   (WELL, ABOUT 18 AT THIS TIME WHAT WITH BUG-FIXES AND RE-ORDERING TITLES....  YOU KNOW THE PROBLEMS IF YOU DO THIS TYPE OF THING.....)    WELL, ON TO THE SCROLLTEXT....   (THE SECOND PART WAS TYPED AT THE 'AUTOMATION WEEKEND' IN AUGUST....    BEFORE GIVING YOU THE SCROLLTEXT FOR CD 317 (ABOLISHED VERSION) I WANT TO SAY A FEW QUICK(ISH) WORDS....    1) WILL ALIEN AND THE POMPEY PIRATES PLEASE IGNORE ALL SLAGS ON THESE SIMULTANEOUSLY RELEASED DISKS (UP TO 328-ISH)...  THEY WERE DONE 'OUT OF SEQUENCE' AND WERE --ALL-- COMPLETED --BEFORE-- THE PHONE CALL YOU GAVE ME....    AND 2) HERE IS A LIST OF THE TITLES ON THE DISKS THAT WERE RELEASED ALONG WITH (OR SOON AFTER) THIS ONE....   CD 303: 3 MUSKETEERS, MOTORWAY DEATH....   CD 304: SPACE HARRIER II (MEG), NEXT GENERATION (MEG), FINAL FRONTIER....    CD 305: UNINVITED, RORKES DRIFT, NOVA, SPACE BLOB....   CD 306: TOP BE ON TOP, DYNASTY WARS (PACKER 3), ACE INVADERS....   CD 307: IRON LORD....   CD 308: RUN THE GAUNTLET, TOWER OF BABEL....   CD 309: PUB TRIVIA (PACKER 3), DEJA-VU, POWER STRUGGLE, BOMBER JACK, FIA....   CD 310: HOYLE'S CARDS, ANIMAL KINGDOM....   CD 311: POWER DRIFT, MR DIG, DOG FIGHT, SOLUTIONS....   CD 312: PHOENIX (NOT 1.9 TOS), LOGO, PYRAMEX....   CD 313: FLOOD, THUNDERSTRIKE....   CD 314(A): POLICE QUEST II, IMPERIUM....   CD 314(B): POLICE QUEST II DATA....   CD 315(A): SPACE QUEST III, TANK BATTLE, LIGHT CYCLES....   CD 315(B): SPACE QUEST III DATA....   CD 316: THE LIFT, 20,000 LEAGUES UNDER THE SEA, PARABELLUM....   CD 317-319 DO NOT EXIST AT THIS TIME....   CD 320: DOMINATION, BLOCKOUT, DEFENDERS OF THE EARTH, ITALY 1990 WINNERS EDITION....   CD 321: AWAITING A PICTURE (GUESS WHAT OF!)   CD 322: SIM CITY EXTRA (REQUIRES 292), LE MARGOULIN, STRIP POKER DIGI-DATA 3 AND 4....   CD 323(A): CHRONO QUEST (A), ZENITH, ROCKET RACER....   CD 323(B): CHRONO QUEST (B AND C), BOLO, TECHMATE CHESS 1.31....   CD 324: JOURNEY TO THE CENTRE OF THE EARTH, CASCADE DISK 15 (WOW, WHAT A CLASSIC - DON'T MISS THIS ONE!)    CD 325: TASS TIMES IN TONE TOWN, FOOTBALL CRAZY (OH NO! ANOTHER ONE! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!)    CD 326: COMBO RACER, PUNISHER AND A MENU WITH 40K FREE ON THE DISK (HA HA CLOG!)    CD 327: BUREAUCRACY, NEVER MIND (AUTOMATION FLIP THE B-DISK, OH MY GOD! NO, REALY, THERE WERE 320 PLUS FILES ON THE B DISK....)    CD 328: COLORADO, DRIVING FORCE....    ALSO COMING SOON...   TOTAL ANARCHY (TOUGH LUCK WAYNE....)   FIRE AND BRIMSTONE    TUSKER    DRAGON NINJA    STEALTH FIGHTER (WITH SAMPLE)    EXODUS    SOLO   AND MAY OTHERS....  AND YOU ALL THOUGHT WE HAD STOPPED DOING STUFF... I DON'T KNOW....  WHAT A BUNCH OF THICKIES....    AND NOW OVER TO A SCROLLTEXT THAT DUE TO A KNACKERED MENU WOULD NEVER HAVE BEEN USED.....    BUT HERE IT IS IN ALL IT'S GLORY!      TO MY LEFT I CAN SEE LOW LIFE TESTING 325 (GOD KNOWS WHAT IS ON IT) AND TO MY RIGHT VAPOUR IS DESPERATLY TRYING TO REMAP A DEGAS SCREEN BECAUSE THE MENU HAS NO SOUND BARS!    BEHIND ME NEIL IS WAITING TO GO TO SLEEP.... AGAIN.... BUT AT LEAST HE HAS JUST FIXED TO BE ON TOP FOR 1.9 TOS....    NO I HAVE -NEVER- TYPED AN INTERESTING SCROLLER VAPOUR, BUT THEN NEITHER HAVE YOU....    WHO DRANK MY PEPSI?   COME ON, OWN UP!    WHERE IS DACK?  YOU CAN NEVER FIND AN UNLIMITED CRAPTALKER WHEN YOU NEED ONE!     IT IS NOW 26 MINUTES PAST 2 ON SUNDAY MORNING AND I HAVE BEEN AWAKE FOR FAR TOO LONG.....    I WISH I COULD GO TO SLEEP, BUT I WILL BE FORCED TO TYPE ANOTHER BORING TEXT SOONISH........     WHY DOES THIS ST MAKE FUNNY NOISES WHEN YOU SWITCH IT ON?    IT SOUNDS AS BAD AS THE GREAT LORD DI-ET KO-KE'S HARD DISK DRIVE.....    NOW SOD OFF AND LET ME GET SOME SLEEP.......      MUSIC RIPPED BY LOW-LIFE   FONT BY LOW-LIFE   BACKGROUND PLANETSCAPE BY LOW-LIFE   CD 315 (A) KNACKERED BY LOW-LIFE   LOTS MORE MUSIC RIPPED BY LOW-LIFE   MANY, MANY PICTURES DRAWN BY LOW-LIFE   TEXT AND CODE BY DISASTER ZONE.......     QUICKY GREETINGS TO.....   WELL, APART FROM ME, THERE IS ONLY ONE PERSON IN THE WORLD WHO DESERVED A GREET....    AND HE WILL GET LOTS OF THEM HERE....   HELLO TO...   MOB AND MOB AND MOB AND MOB AND MOB AND MOB AND MOB AND MOB AND MOB AND MOB AND MOB AND NOW I DON'T HAVE TO GREET YOU FOR AGES, DO I?    I AM GOING NOW.....

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AUTOMATION 303      OH, LOOK...  IT'S THAT FONT AGAIN....    WELL, ANOTHER DISK, ANOTHER SCROLLY THINGY TO BANG AWAY AT ON THE KEYBOARD!   (IF WE ALL HATE TYPING THEM SO MUCH, WHY DO WE HAVE THEM ON EVERY DISK?)   OK, GUYS!  LETS CHAT ABOUT...........   TYPING...   TYPING WAS INVENTED BY A TINY LATIN AMERICAN FIELD MOUSE TO PASS THE TIME WHILE WAITING FOR HIS FIELD TO BE DUG UP BY THE LOCAL FARMER. HE TAUGHT HIS CHILDREN TO TYPE AND SOON THE WHOLE VILLIAGE HAD THE SKILL (WHICH IS VERY STRANGE, AS MICE HAVE VERY SMALL HANDS, AND IT MUST BE DIFFICULT TO PRESS THOSE KEYS!)   ANYWAY, SOON FAME OF THIS SKILL SPREAD LIKE WILDFIRE AND THEY WERE KNOWN THROUGHOUT THE LAND...    THIS WAS WHEN THE SCROLLTEXT WAS INVENTED.  BASICALLY, THESE MICE DISCOVERED THAT ANY MESSAGE THAT SCROLLS FROM RIGHT TO LEFT, NO MATTER HOW BORING OR DULL, OR STUPID, OR FULL OF SLAGS, OR BADILEY SPILT, OR EVEN A NICE POLITE INTERESTING ONE, WILL BE READ. IT'S IRRESISTABLE!   (GO ON!  JUST ONE MORE CHARACTER!)    ANYWAY, SOON THE MICE WERE RICH AND FAMOUS AND LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER.   THEN THE NASTY 'RATS AND RODENTS' COMMISION CAUGHT ON TO THE IDEA.  TEN MINUTES LATER THEY REALISED THAT THE 'SCROLLER' WAS NOT COPYRIGHTED! (LIKE US, THEY WOULDN'T HAVE CARED IF IT HAD BEEN!)    HA!  LETS DO WHAT THEY DID TO 'MR RUBIK' THEY SAID!   NOW THE WORD IS FULL OF THESE TERRIBLE THINGS, FORCING MANY, MANY PEOPLE TO READ THE UTTER CRAP CONTAINED IN THEM....   AND THIS WAS ANOTHER ONE....

304

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AUTOMATION CD 304 #     I KNOW THAT WE PROMISED YOU NO MORE ONE MEG GAMES, BUT IT IS VERY DIFFICULT TO GET A GAME THAT ORIGINALLY NEEDED ONE MEG TO RUN IN 512K - THAT IS WHY 'NEXT GENERATION' IS 1 MEG....    AS FOR SPACE HARRIER II....   WELL, NEIL RECONED THAT IT WOULD NEED ABOUT 300 ODD FILES TO MAKE A 512K VERSION, AND WITHOUT FLIPPING THE DATA TO SIDE B THIS IS THE ONLY WAY TO DO IT...   NICE ONE HOMEBOY....     THE OTHERS MAY NEED ONE MEG, I AM NOT SURE, BUT THEY ARE CRAP ANYWAY, SO IT DOESN'T MATTER, DOES IT?    BIG MEGAMIGHTY HALLO TO THE ONLY PEEPS WHO SHOULD EVER SEE THIS DISK...   GRODAN AND VAP VAP (FROM SO WATT!)   NEIL OF COR BLIMEY   APPOLLO AND THE GUARDIANS   EGB AND THE SUB HUMANS   THE HOMEBOY   MOB   AND, OF COURSE, THE OTHER UNNAMEABLES...  DACK AND THE STAINLESS STEEL RAT!    WRAP...

305

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YO!  AUTOMATION 305    MUSIC BY MAXIMUS MADUS...   FONT BY FLANNY (IRS)    CODE BY LAW....   PICCY FROM AN ANTIC DISK, BUT I LIKED IT SO MUCH I HAD TO USE IT!    AND NOW A QUICK WORD ABOBLAH! BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! BZZZZZZZZ!  ZSHHHHHH!   CRUHHHH!  SHSHHHHHH! BUZZZZZZZZZZ!  BANGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!   HEY WELCOME PLEASE DO NOT ATTEMPT TO AJUST YOUR COMPUTER, THERE IS NOTHING WRONG!!!!!.   WE HAVE TAKEN CONTROL  OVER THIS KEYBOARD AS TO BRING YOU THIS SPECIAL SCROLL!     WE WILL RETURN IT TO YOU AS SOON AS YOU ARE GROOOOOVING!! A WELCOME TO STATION  'W-E-F-U-N-K'  BETTER KNOWN AS 'WE FUNK' OR DEEPER STILL  'THE HOMEBOY CONNECTION' HOME OF THE EXTRATERRESTRIAL BROTHER'S!!!  BUILDER'S OF FUNKEY MUSIC 'P.FUNK' 'UNCUT FUNK' 'THE PUMP!!!!'   THIS IS COMING DIRECTLY FOR YOU FROM THE MOTHERSHIP.  OH! ME, I'M KNOW AS THE LOLLYPOP MAN.(ALAS 'S.T.M!') THE LONG HAIRED SUCKER, MY MOTTO IS............HEY STOP THAT! THIS IS GETTING REALLY SILLY NOW TALK NICELY TO ALL THE PEOPLE OUT THERE IN 'AUTOMATION LAND'   LET THE SHOW BEGIN............. YO! DUDES! THE HOMEBOY IN CONTROL AT LONG LAST. A WHOLE SCROLLER TO MOIR! (THAT MEANS 'MYSELF' FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T SPEEK FROGGY LINGO!)         WELL NOW COMES THE REAL PROBLEM, WHAT THE F..K DO I TYPE IN.          YOU KNOW GUY'S AND GAL'S IT'S ONE THING WANTIN' TO WRITE A SCROLLER, BUT WHEN YOU ACTUALY GET TO DO ONE! WELL THAT'S A DIFFERENT MATTER! HEY!!! DON'T ANY OF YOU OUT THERE DARE PRESS ANY KEYS TO PLAY ANY OF THE BRILLIANT GAMES ON THIS MENU, COS IF YOU DO BEFORE I'VE FINISHED THIS SCROLLER, YOUR COMPUTER WILL BLOW UP!   YOUR MONITOR WILL TURN INTO A TELEVISION! AND WILL ONLY BE ABLE TO RECEIVE CHANNEL 4S WALES (AND BOY! IS THAT CRAP IN IT'S SELF - THE LAW ADDS, MEGA CRAP!) AND YOU WILL SPEND ETERNITY LISTENING TO 'JASON AND KYLEY' SO THINK HARD BEFORE TOUCHING THE KEYBOARD!  'YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!!!' O.K. THEN LET'S START WITH MUSIX!!  HANDS UP EVERYONE OUT THERE WHO LIKES HEAVY METAL!  (CRAP!)  NOT MANY EH! OK WHAT ABOUT THEN TOP OF CHART POP MUSIK! (EEEHHHHH! I THINK I,M GOING TO THROW UP!) O.K  HANDS DOWN, A FEW OF YOU LIKE THAT SORT OF STUFF! (WELL THAT IS NOT YOUR FAULT ,LACK OF TASTE I GUESS)      O.K. THEN NOW HANDS UP ALL OF YOU OUT THERE WHO LIKE   ' RAP! RAVE! AND HOUSE GROOOOOOVE! '    YER! ACIEEEEED!!!!!!!!!! ACIEEEEEEED!!!!!! YEEEEER!   THAT'S MORE LIKE IT  I CAN HERE THOSE 'BASS BEATS' PUMPIN OUT THERE!!      EVERY BODY SAY HO!!!!!      HO!!!! EVERY BODY  SAY   HO!!!!!!     HO!!!!      HEY! LOOK HERE YOU LONG HAIRED HIPPY! IF YER DON'T LIKE IT THEN 'P..S-OFF!!!!' YER THIS REALLY IS A GROOOOOVY SCROLLER INIT!  O.K  YOU LOT!!   GO OUT IMMEDIATELY AND GO AND BUY THE NEW ALBUM BY 'A TRIBE CALLED QUEST' PEOPLE'S INSTINCTIVE TRAVELS AND THE PATHS OF RHYTHM!!!!!!!! ON JIVE CHIP96!! (C.D. IF POSS)   OK RALPHY THERE YOU GO A NICE PLUG! SO SEND ME LOTS STUFF(PLEASE) BASICALLY BOY'S AND GIRLS ANYTHING RELEASED ON 'ZOMBA OR JIVE' IS WORTH GETTIN!!  YOU KNOW IT!!!!!      NOW FOR MY TOP 10 LIST OF FAVE ALBUMS OUT AT THE MOMENT ............................10...YOUNG M.C 'STONE COLD RHYMIN'..... 9...TOO SHORT 'LIFE IS..'.......8...D.J. JAZZY JEFF AND THE FRESH PRINCE 'AND IN THIS CORNER'........7...PUBLIC ENEMY 'FEAR OF A BLACK PLANET'.........6...3RD BASS 'THE CACTUS ALBUM'.........5... QUEEN LATIFAH 'ALL HAIL THE QUEEN'...........4...JANET JACKSON '1840 THE REMIX'( OUT AT THE END OF JULY! BELIEVE ME THIS IS A HOT ALBUM)........3...SNAP 'WORLD POWER'...........2...SALT 'N' PEPPER 'BLACK MAGIC'...........AND OF COURSE IN NUMBER 1 POSITION..A TRIBE CALLED QUEST 'PEOPLE'S INSTINCTIVE TRAVELS AND THE PATHS OF RHYTHM'(WHAT A TITLE!!!! CHECK THIS OUT IF YOU DARE!) OH! I NEARLY FORGOT TO MENTION THE NEW REMIX OF 'BONITA APPLEBUM' WITH CAROL KING'S BASS BEATS RIP OFF!!!! BRILLLLLLL!!!!! RIGHT NOW FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE TAKEN THE TIME TO READ ALL OF THE FUNKY SCROLLER!..........'GREETING'S TIME'.......O.K. FIRST OF ALL A BIG MEGA THANX TO VAPOUR! THE MAIN MAN BEHIND AUTOMATION(HEY WHAT'S IT LIKE NOT BEING ABLE TO SLEEP THEN? GOO GOO GA GA!!) AND TA! VERY MUCH TO THE LAW! FOR LETTING ME BEAM IN ON THIS SCROLLER!    MORE MEGA HI'S GO TO THE REST OF AUTOMATION!  ...  B.B.C (ANDY THE ARFLING HEY IF YOU DON'T RING ME SOON I'LL BURN YOUR COLLECTION OF NINJA TURTLES TOY'S!!  YOOOOO!!!! TO THE PILOT IS THIS SCROLLER FUNKY ENOUGH FOR YA!!)  ...  SUB HUMANS IN TURKEY ( HEY E.G.B. WHERE'S MY 'GET DOWN' T.SHIRT'S NOTE I WANT 2 IF POSS NICE TALKIN TO YER!  ...  NEIL OF COR BLIMY SORRY ABOUT NOT SENDING YOU ANY C.D'S YET BUT I WILL SOON ! I PROMISE!  ...  THE GUARDIANS OF LOGIK (NOT MET YOU GUY'S YET BUT YOUR MENUS ARE GREAT!)  ...  OZZ  ...  SHARAZ JEK  ...  AND NOW THE REST OF MY PERSONAL GREETS.............HI TO ALL YOU FRENCH CREWS! REPLICANTS  ...  THE CAREBEARS  ...  EMPIRE  ...  MCA  ...  ETC KEEP THOSE HACKS COMMIN!!!  ALSO HI TO MY GOOD FRIENDS THE LOST BOYS! GREAT NEW DEMO GUY'S KEEP IT UP (HEY I HOPE THE DISK MAG GOES WELL SAMMY JOE!)  ...  ROBBIE G! (HEY ROB WHERE'S MY F.....G! TAPES)  ...  BILLY BIZ AND MRS MARJ (HEY WHEN YOU GONNA COME AND SEE ME!) ANOTHER S.T. GIRLY!!  ...  ALLAN IN SUFFOLK (WHEN YOU GONNA GET YOUR SELF AN ALAS HACKERLORD STINKS!!!) OH! AND A SMALL HI TO STEVEN THE DORK AND HELDER THE COMPUTER FREAK! (HOW'S THAT ALLAN!!)  ...  MR TREBOR (LOOK YOU FINALY GOT A MENTION ON A MENU! P.S THANX FOR MENACE!)  ...  LISA B (AMPUTATED ANY LEGS LATELY EHHHH! AND I HEARD ABOUT THE CAT!)  ...  MARK DUBOISE (IS YOUR LAST NAME FOR REAL??)  ...  DR PENMAN (MEGA THANX FOR THE EDITOR AND THE HELP WITH MY PILES!! HA! HA!)  ...  EMILY AND RALPH (HAVE FUN IN THE STATES AND DON'T FORGET MY 'LIFE A BEACH' SHORTS)  ...  DEREK M.D.(HOPE TO MEET WHEN I SEE THE PILOT IN SEPTEMBER  ...   AND LAST BUT BY NO MEANS LEAST A MEGA HAGGISY YOOO!!! TO THE JO-BILL CREW (YOU ARE THE BEST SUPPLIERS BY FAR! BUT WHAT ABOUT MY PHONE 'BILLS'!!!!    A MEGA SORRY TO ALL YOU OUT THERE WHO I HAVE FORGOT BUT IF IM ALLOWED TO DO ANOTHER SCROLLER I'LL TRY AND REMEMBER YOU NEXT TIME..............O.K..........AND NOW FOR THE MEGA 'JOKE' .......ME!....... OPPS! NO!.........'WHAT IS ROUND AND GOES UP AND DOWN ON A PIECE OF STRING?????........................A YO!

306

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HELLO, AND WELCOME TO THE COMPACTION MASTERS 306    I (LAW) HAVE SUB-TITLED THIS DISK....  'NEIL'S RETURN'    NICE WORK NEIL, AND GREAT TO TALK TO YOU AT LAST AFTER ONLY TWO YEARS OF BEING IN THE SAME CREW!    I WILL USE YOUR 'TOWER OF BABEL' AND 'RUN THE GAUNTLET' SOON, OK!     WELL, WELL, WHAT HAVE WE HERE?   COULD IT BE THE 'POMPEY PACKER 1.5'?    YES, I THINK SO!  OH, WHAT A PITY I HAVE JUST SPREAD IT ALL OVER THE COUNTRY....   HA!  REVENGE.PRG IS OUT!   NOW THOSE SCUMMY GITS CAN GET A TASTE OF THEIR (NOTE THE SPELLING) OWN SPITTLE!    AND NOW SOME PACKER COMPARISONS....   I TOOK A 75666 BYTE MENU FILE AND PACKED IT WITH...   AUTOMATION 2.5     POMPEY PACKER 1.5    AND AUTOMATION PACKER 3.0      HERE ARE THE RESULTS....    AUTOMATION 2.5....    SIZE:   24030 BYTES   TIME: APPROX 10 MINUTES....     (NOT BAD)    POMPEY PACKER 1.5....    SIZE:   23148 BYTES   TIME: APPROX 36 MINUTES....     (SLOOOOW)    AUTOMATION 3.0....    SIZE:   23270 BYTES   TIME: APPROX 1.5 MINUTES....     (HOW BLOODY FAST?!?)    AS YOU CAN SEE, PACKER 3.0 WAS STILL SLIGHTLY LARGER THAN PP 1.5, BUT THEN IT DID DO THE FILE IN UNDER TWO MINUTES FLAT....    SUCK ON THAT ONE ALIEN!  WE AIN'T WAITING 3 HOURS FOR A DISK TO PACK ANY MORE....     ANOTHER EXAMPLE....  I PACKED 'DYNASTY WARS' WITH 2.5 TO 380K IN 2 1/2 HOURS....   I THEN RE PACKED IT WITH 3.0 TO 333K IN 10 MINUTES....    QUITE A PERFORMANCE ENHANCER, DONT YOU THINK?     ENOUGH CRAPTALK, LET'S DO IT AGAIN!

306v2

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HELLO, AND WELCOME TO THE COMPACTION MASTERS 306    I (LAW) HAVE SUB-TITLED THIS DISK....  'NEIL'S RETURN'    NICE WORK NEIL, AND GREAT TO TALK TO YOU AT LAST AFTER ONLY TWO YEARS OF BEING IN THE SAME CREW!    I WILL USE YOUR 'TOWER OF BABEL' AND 'RUN THE GAUNTLET' SOON, OK!     WELL, WELL, WHAT HAVE WE HERE?   COULD IT BE THE 'POMPEY PACKER 1.5'?    YES, I THINK SO!  OH, WHAT A PITY I HAVE JUST SPREAD IT ALL OVER THE COUNTRY....   HA!  REVENGE.PRG IS OUT!   NOW THOSE SCUMMY GITS CAN GET A TASTE OF THEIR (NOTE THE SPELLING) OWN SPITTLE!    AND NOW SOME PACKER COMPARISONS....   I TOOK A 75666 BYTE MENU FILE AND PACKED IT WITH...   AUTOMATION 2.5     POMPEY PACKER 1.5    AND AUTOMATION PACKER 3.0      HERE ARE THE RESULTS....    AUTOMATION 2.5....    SIZE:   24030 BYTES   TIME: APPROX 10 MINUTES....     (NOT BAD)    POMPEY PACKER 1.5....    SIZE:   23148 BYTES   TIME: APPROX 36 MINUTES....     (SLOOOOW)    AUTOMATION 3.0....    SIZE:   23270 BYTES   TIME: APPROX 1.5 MINUTES....     (HOW BLOODY FAST?!?)    AS YOU CAN SEE, PACKER 3.0 WAS STILL SLIGHTLY LARGER THAN PP 1.5, BUT THEN IT DID DO THE FILE IN UNDER TWO MINUTES FLAT....    SUCK ON THAT ONE ALIEN!  WE AIN'T WAITING 3 HOURS FOR A DISK TO PACK ANY MORE....     ANOTHER EXAMPLE....  I PACKED 'DYNASTY WARS' WITH 2.5 TO 380K IN 2 1/2 HOURS....   I THEN RE PACKED IT WITH 3.0 TO 333K IN 10 MINUTES....    QUITE A PERFORMANCE ENHANCER, DONT YOU THINK?     ENOUGH CRAPTALK, LET'S DO IT AGAIN!

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AUTOMATION CD 308 BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE LAW.....    BOTH THESE GAMES WERE HACKED AND PACKED INTO FILES BY NEIL OF COR BLIMEY NOT ARF....     GREAT WORK YET AGAIN, NEIL!  I AM GREATLY LOOKING FORWARD TO MEETING YOU AT THE AUTOMATION WEEKEND IN AUGUST!    IN FRONT OF ME AT THIS VERY MOMENT IS A PILE OF DISKS THAT MOB HAS SENT ME (YES, I DID SAY ANY OLD CRAP!) SO I SUPPOSE I SHOULD LOOK AT THESE SOON. I ALSO HAVE ..FIRE.. TO DO. I HAVE GOT QUITE A LONG WAY INTO THIS ONE SO MAYBE I SHALL FINISH IT OFF TONIGHT!  YET ANOTHER BOOT GAME INTO FILES BY AUTOMATION...    YO! F.O.F.    HOW ABOUT A DIFFERENT MENU THEN....   DONT YOU THINK 28 IS PUSHING IT A BIT FOR ONE PIECE OF CODE....     GREETS TIME........   HYPER HI TO...   VAPOUR (THE MAN WITH THREE HEADS)   APPOLLO   SUB HUMANS   COR BLIMEY NOT ARF   AND THE OFFICIAL GAME TESTERS....   ULTRAQUICK MOB AND THE MEGAMIGHTY HOMEBOY!    NOW FOR THE WRAP......       PS.  LOST BOYS MAGGIE IS GREAT........   HOPE IT GOES WELL, GUYS!

308v2

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AUTOMATION 308 VERSION 2              AUTOMATION 308 VERSION 2              ANOTHER RE RELEASED AUTOMATION MENU,       THIS TIME WITH TOWER OF BABEL FIXED.      NEIL MISSED ONE LAST CHECKSUM,,,,,,,,THANKS TO SQUID FOR SPOTTING THIS YEARS AGO!   MENU CODED BY THE LAW OF AUTOMATION     MENU PICTURE BY THE CMT     FONT BY XERUD     ADDITIONAL CODING BY GRAZEY      MUSIC BY DUBMOOD ENTITLED   MR DEAHS OMEGA ILLUSION      MENU COMPILED BY GRAZEY.         BOTH CRACKS BY NEIL OF COR BLIMEY NOT ARF!                                OK VERY BRIEF GREETINGS TO,,,,,,,,,    THE REST OF THE ACTIVE AUTOMATION AND D BUG MEMBERS STILL AROUND,,,,,,,, THE LAW. OZZWALD. XERUD. SSR. DACK. COL. MARL. ASYLUM. FLANNY. EGB. ARN. ANDY,         TSCC. RG (ARE YOU STILL ALIVE?).   ACTIV8. KARADOC. GWEM. GGN. DMA SC. DHS. PARANOIA. ALIVE. LINEOUT. JAKE OF DEPRESSION. YES CREW. RAZOR 1911. OZK. DUBMOOD. SECTOR ONE. TUC. TORMENT. MJJ PROD. GT TURBO. MIKRO AND TINKER,                WRAP TIME    AUGUST 2007

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AUTOMATION MENU 309.....    THIS FONT IS GETTING AROUND A BIT NOW, SO I SUPPOSE IT IS ABOUT TIME IT RETIRED....   OK, WELL MAYBE A FEW MORE THINGS WITH IT THEN. C'MON XERUD, WHERE'S MY NEW ONE?   RIGHT, THE TIME NOW IS 12:50 AM, MONDAY 16TH OF JULY, AND I AM SITTING AT THIS HERE KEYBOARD WONDERING WHAT TO TYPE....    THE MUSIC WAS INCLUDED JUST FOR APPOLLO 'COS HE LOVES THIS TUNE (SO DO I)     THE FONT WAS INSERTED JUST FOR IGNITOR 'COS HE HATES IT (SO DO I)     THE CHEAP-N-NASTY STARFIELD WAS INCLUDED JUST FOR NEIL.E 'COS HE SAID NO-ONE HAD DONE A RANDOM ONE YET     THE TEXT WAS TYPED BY LAW 'COS HE WAS IN A GENEROUS MOOD AND WANTED YOU ALL TO HAVE SOMETHING TO READ....     THE DISK WAS ALSO PUT TOGETHER BY LAW, AND WHAT FUN I HAD TOO!     NOW WHAT......      HOW ABOUT SPREADING THE GREETS ABOUT THIS SCROLL, AS WE DID MANY, MANY DISKS BACK......    HI VAPOUR...    OK. I WAS JUST LOOKING THROUGH MY BLANK BOX AND I FOUND A DISK WITH 'ALF MEGA DEMO' ON IT.  NOW BEING A DEMO COLLECTOR MYSELF I CANNOT SEE WHAT IN THE WORLD IT IS DOING IN THERE. ALSO, I CANNOT REMEMBER AT ALL HOW I GOT A COPY. IN FACT, I ALMOST DIDN'T. IF IT WASN'T FOR THE FACT THAT I BOOT STUFF UP BEFORE FORMATTING THEM, I WOULDN'T. COME ON. OWN UP. WHO SENT ME A COPY OF THIS GREAT DEMO. I HAVE NO IDEA, AND WOULD BE VERY INTERESTED TO FIND OUT.  MAYBE I SHOULD TIDY UP MY DISKS AND RE-ORGANISE MY POSTAL-OUTPUT-SEMI-AUTOMATIC-PARCEL-DELIVERY-CONSOLE!          WHAT?         DON'T MIND ME, I'M JUST TALKING CRAP AGAIN!       OH, YES, BY THE WAY, YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE THIS DISK......    GO AWAY AND FORMAT IT YOU DIRTY LITTLE PIRATE.      WHY SHOULD YOU NOT HAVE THIS DISK?       WELL, AUTOMATION ARE            D E A D            (AND YOU WERE SILLY ENOUGH TO BELIEVE THE RUMOURS, SILLY LITTLE KIDDIES! - ALL YOU NOW HAVE TO DO IS GET THE OTHER 49 DISKS THAT WERE SIMULTANEOUSLY RELEASED ALONG WITH THIS ONE TO MARK OUR RETURN, MINUS THE BBC (GOOD LUCK GOING IT ALONE, GUYS!)    LET IT BE KNOWN THAT WE ARE BACK!)        HO HUM....   HI ANDY/PILOT......      YO! COL! HAN I HAVE THE KEYDISK VALUE FOR THE NEXT ROB.N DECODE, PLEASE?  IT DOES HELP, HONEST!     HI EGB/S.S. RAT     COMING SOON (BUT DON'T COUNT ON IT!)....     ALL THE MACVENTURES IN 512K....   HI APPOLLO....    FLOOD....   HI NEIL OF CB....    BLUE ANGELS....    HI SHARAZ/AXE....    PLUS OTHER ASSORTED CRAPPY TITLES WRITTEN IN THE WORST THING IMAGINABLE....    STOS (QUICK GET A BUCKET, I THINK I'M GONNA PUKE!  I WOULD TELL YOU WHAT I THINK STOS STANDS FOR, BUT WE 'AIN'T GONNA SWEAR ON THIS SCROLLER!)    HI MOB AND HOMEBOY....    WELL THAT IS ENOUGH, PLEASE NOTE THAT I HAVE LEFT ROOM ON HERE FOR SOME DEJA-VU SAVE GAMES....     TIME NOW:   1:03 AM....    WRAP...

310

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AUTOMATION COMPACT DISK 310...    WOW! ANOTHER ONE THAT DOES NOT EXIST.  BOY, WE ARE SO CLEVER WE ARE STILL RELEASING DISKS EVEN AFTER OUR DEATH!    THE TROUBLE WITH THIS SCROLLER (APART FROM WRECKING YOU EYESIGHT BY ITS SPEED) IS THAT I HAVE TO TYPE A LOT, OR IT FINISHES TOO QUICK!    HO HUM!   I COULD DO THE GREETINGS, BUT I WON'T!       NEWSFLASH.... POMPEY PACKER IS EVERYWHERE...   ALIEN IS REPORTED TO HAVE COMMITED SUICIDE FROM SHAME...     JPM HAS MOVED HOUSE, MUCH TO THE ANNOYANCE OF THE NEW RESIDENTS WHO ARE GETTING HIS PHONE CALLS...   RUMOUR HAS IT THEY HAVE CALLED THE COPS....   SO DONT PHONE JPM AT HIS OLD NUMBER ANY MORE...     (BETTER STILL, DONT CALL HIM AT ALL!)       OK, SO MAYBE I SHOULD GREET SOME PEOPLE...   AH, WELL. IF I MUST. GREETINGS TO....   THE POMPEY PIRATES (NO, SORRY, ONLY JOKING, BAD BREATH TO THE PUMPING PRICKS!)   GREETINS (NORMAL, SANE, ONES!)   JPM (THANKS FOR THE PACKER!)  MOB  MAL  HOMEBOY  IAN.C  WAYNE  MERLIN  TUCKER (IRS BAAAA!)  PURSEY  THE CMT  FLANNY (IRS BAAAA!)  ALL REPLICANTS WHO LIVE OUTSIDE BRITAIN  THE CAREBEARS  THE UNION  HOTLINE  AND THE BAD BREW CREW...   I AGREE WITH VAP...   BLAST THE PUMPING PIPESUCKERS INTO OBLIVION...   THEY AINT EVEN IN YOUR LEAGUE, ANDY!    AH, WELL, MAYBE I WON'T TYPE MUCH AND I'LL DO THE WRAP.....

311

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THANKS TO STEVE.C FOR THE ORIGINAL OF POWERDRIFT. DO NOT WORRY ABOUT THE GLICHE WHICH APPEARS OCCASIONALLY.  IT WAS THE BEST I COULD DO AT THE TIME. POWER DRIFT WAS SUCH A DIFFICULT ONE TO GET RUNNING AS A FILE LOADED GAME THAT I HAVE SATISFIED MYSELF WITH THIS VERSION. I DID NOT LIKE CRAPTIVISIONS RAM DISK SO I WROTE MY OWN INTO THIS GAME. I DO NOT WISH TO BORE PEOPLE WITH A LENGTHY EXPLANATION ON WHY I FOUND THIS GAME DIFFICULT TO GET RUNNING. THE BEST THING TO DO IS TO TRY IT YOURSELF......  THE PROTECTION IS EASY TO CRACK...  THE LOADER IN THE GAME IS CRAP AND IT IS A PAIN TO GET DATA FROM SIDE 2 OF THE ORIGINAL DISKS... AND WELL GETTING THE THING RUNNING WITH ITS OWN CODE WAS VIRTUALLY IMPOSSIBLE SO I MADE MY OWN CHANGES AND FORCED THE SUCKER TO WORK. TRY ENTERING SUPERVISOR MODE... CHANGE SR TO 300 HEX AND TRY AND RUN SOME OTHER CODE... FROM A DESKTOP FILE THE ST FREEZES BUT FROM A BOOT DISK THIS CODE IS PERFECTLY LEGIT!......     MANY THANKS TO THE UN-NAMEABLE ONE FOR THIS CODE. PLEASE SEND LOADS MORE INTROS....   OH YEAH!  I FIXED YOUR CODE FOR THE STE AND I SHALL FORWARD THIS SOURCE TO YOU SHORTLY....  QUICK GREETS GO TO MOB   DEREK MD   MIKE OF HOTLINE    DRAXS    PETE.W     IAN.C FOR THIS NICE PIC  AND THE ALL TIME GREAT REPLICANTS AND CAREBEARS     SEE YOU ON ANOTHER MENU...  BYE.... VAPOUR.....  ALMOST FORGOT!  THANKS TO MONTY FOR THE ADVENTURE SOLUTIONS AND HI TO BIG EDDIE AND DAL SNUFFS!!!!!!            WELL.......        WHAT DO YOU THINK OF IT............           I WAS A BIT PISSED OFF FROM CODING MY NEW GAME SO I THOUGHT THAT I WOULD WRITE A MENU INTRO FOR YAH.............            I HOPE YOU LIKE IT..............          ALL THE SOURCE CODE AND GRAFIX ARE ON THE DISK SO IF YOU WANT TO USE THIS INTRO THEN IT WILL BE EASY TO MODIFY FOR LOADING YOUR PROGRAMS............            IF I GET ANY MORE TIME OFF FROM PROGRAMMING, I MAY WRITE SOME MORE INTROS FOR YAH..........                IF YOU DO USE IT AND WANT TO GREET ME, THEN SAY HI TO    THE UN-NAMEABLE ONE ..........        YEAH IT IS A WANK PSEUDONYM BUT I CANT THINK OF OUGHT ELSE................         IF THE SOFTWARE HOUSES I AM CURRENTLY WRITING FOR FIND OUT ABOUT THIS I WILL HAVE MY BOLLOCKS CRUSHED, SO MUMS THE WORD, OK.............         OH YEAH, PRESS F1-F10 FOR THE MUKAZ............               WRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!!!!

313

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AUTOMATION CD 312 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ARE YOU BORED YET ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? WRAZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ  . . . . . . . .

313

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AUTOMATION - THE NEXT GENERATION   PRESENT    COMPACT DISK 313....     THANKS GO TO THE UN-NAMEABLE ONE FOR THIS CODE....       AND THANKS TO IAN.C FOR THE PICTURE..  SORRY I COULDNT USE THE ONE THAT GOES WITH IT, IAN.   THIS MENU WAS COMPILED BY DISASTER ZONE USING MY VERSION OF FLOOD, ALONG WITH A VERSION OF THUNDERSTRIKE ALSO DONE BY ME -WHAT A CLEVER SOD I AM!-   I HOPE YOU LIKE THEM BOTH....      THERE IS A DOC FILE FOR FLOOD ON THIS DISK, BUT YOU CANT GET TO IT FROM HERE BECAUSE FLOOD IS IN THE AUTO FOLDER.....    GREETINGS TO...   THE ONE AND ONLY CAREBEARS....   THE ONE AND ONLY REPLICANTS....   THE ONE AND ONLY EX-AUTOMATION 1.0....   SERWER-SOFT....   THE UNION....   MANTRONIX....   THE MEDWAY BOY....   THE OVERLANDERS....   AND ALL OTHER GOOD CREWS AND CONTACTS....    MEGA-DROP-DEAD TO....  GUESS.....   YUP....  TEN OUT OF TEN...    ALIEN, OR IS IS ALAMEIEN OR ALOON, DAMION....  OOOPS, GOT YOUR NAME FROM SOMEWHERE....  HOPE YOUR TEL. NUMBER IS NEXT.....    ALSO MEGA-DIE TO THE BLOKE IN GWENT....  I HEAR YOUR ROBIN RELIANT WAS GIVING TROUBLE LATELY....   MAYBE ITS DRUNK FROM BEING OUTSIDE THE PUB ALL THE TIME....    LET THIS JERK BE AN EXAMPLE FOR YOU ALL AS TO WHAT HAPPENS TO PEOPLE WHO TRY TO RIP US OFF....   THERE SHOULD BE AN UPDATED CD LIST COMING SOON, MAYBE ON 325....    ANYWAY, I WILL NOW REPEAT WHAT LITTLE I HAVE TYPED....

314a

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BLOODY HELL, THIS IS HARD TO READ, INNIT?     PLUS AND MINUS CONTROL THE SPEED....      AUTOMATION PRESENT THEIR NEXT CD...   PLEASE NOTE THAT YOU WILL REQUIRE CD 314 (B) IN ORDER TO PLAY POLICE QUEST II (AXE THE AMAZING DOES IT AGAIN!)    WELL, I (DISASTER ZONE), AM SITTING HERE AT G.O.L. HEADQUARTERS EXACTLY ONE WEEK BEFORE THE REST OF AUTOMATION ARIVE, AND BOY AM I LOOKING FORWARD TO IT!    MEMBERS PRESENT WILL BE...   WELL, I DON'T ACTUALLY KNOW YET, AS LIKE ALL OTHER COMPUTER RELATED EXCURSIONS IT IS GOING TO BE A LAST MINUTE COCK UP!    ANYWAY, FUN FOR ANYONE WHO DOES TURN UP, I'M SURE!      WHAT CAN I TYPE NOW....     COMING SOON (OR PAST) TO A CD NEAR YOU AS LONG AS IT'S AN AUTOMATION ONE.....     SPACE QUEST III....  TANK BATTLE....  LIGHT CYCLES....  THE LIFT....  20000 LEAGUES UNDER THE SEA....  PARABELLUM....  PHOENIX....  LOGO....  PYRAMEX....  THEME PARK MYSTERY....  AND COBRA II (AT LAST!)    THERE IS PROBABLY MORE, BUT I CAN'T REMEMBER ALL THIS ON MY OWN....   I THINK I SHALL WAIT FOR SOMEONE ELSE TO TAKE OVER THE KEYBOARD NOW......         (SCROOGE HAS JUST WALKED INTO THE ROOM!)     HI! IT'S SCROOGE AGAIN, JUST POPPING ROUND TO SAY I'M OFF TO SPAIN, SO I WON'T BE AT THE AUTOMATION MEETING....   NEVER MIND, I'LL BE THINKING OF YOU GUYS WHEN I'M DECKED OUT ON THE BEACH!    BYE BYE.......    WHO'S NEXT?     YO BOTCH IT IS HERE AT LAST MY FIRST SCOLLTEXT YEAH WHAT AN HONOUR OR SHOULD THAT BE WHAT A PAIN IN THE BACKSIDE WELL I HAVE LOTS OF WORK TO DO SO THIS IS GOING TO BE SHORT AND SWEET THERE IS GOING TO BE A GOOD CHANCE THAT F29 RETALIATOR IS GOING TO APPEAR AT A (HE HAS JUST GONE TO TAPE STAR TREK OFF SKY TV, SO I WILL TYPE THIS BRACKET!) TV IN FRONT OF YOU WELL OUR OFFICIAL OUTLET IN THE USA WILL SOON BE ALL ARRANGED AND THEN WE WILL BE CONTINATIONAL-MULTI-TASKING-PIRATE-COMPANY-DESTROY-THE-POMPEYS-    WELL THAT'S THE EGO TRIP OVER WITH AND NOT EVEN A VAPOUR IN SIGHT (YET!!!)    NOW BACK DOWN TO EARTH AND ON WITH OUR TASKS IF ANY ONE HAS ANY CONSTRUCTIVE SUGGESTIONS THEN CONTACT US (WE ALREADY KNOW ALL THE ALIEN ONES!) GREETS TIME       MEGA GREETS TO EVERYONE WHO COLLECTS OUR DISKS AND FORMATS THE POMPEY DISKS FOR BLANKS (THEY'RE MORE ENTERTAINING THAT WAY - BUT FOR COMPLETE STERILIZATION - BURN 'EM!!!)   THE CREDITS FOR THIS INTRO ARE AS FOLLOWS . . . . . .UNDERLAY LOGO BY SPAZ OF THE LOST BOYS....    OVERLAY CRAPFONT BY XERUD (DRAW ME SOME BACKDROPS IN EIGHT COLOURS AND A NEW FONT PLEEEEEEEEEZE!!!!!!!!)   MUSIC BY MAX THE HAIRY HIPPLE....   OH, YES, AND CODE BY ME (DISASTER ZONE!)     NOW SOD OFF THE LOT OF YOU!

314b

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AUTOMATION CD 314(B) USING -T-H-E--F-O-N-T- AGAIN!    PRESS WHATEVER YOU WANT 'COS YOU CAN'T QUIT OR RUN ANYTHING FROM HERE....    ONLY 14K FREE ON DISK, SO I'LL STOP HERE......